once again another shit weekend of arguments, when does it end? and where do the good times start?

it seems like the end draws forever closer on my relationship but can the end be prolonged or stopped? who knows

the real question i ask myself is do i want it to end?
im kinda stuck either way,

what can someone in my position do right now?
for now the only thing i can think of doing is burying my head in the sand and hoping these problems go away but its not gonna be that easy i know thats for sure,
it seems easyright now cause all i have to do is write it all down here and then it gone from my mind, it seems like the only time i can say what i really feel is when i write it down so it looks like this is actually helping me deal with my feelings in a way,

i just wish this thing could solve them for me, but if it was that easy everyones life would be simple, just write something down and it would be solved wow imagine if that was true the bliss life would be, life would be a breeze but still we trundle on through the shit in our life forever trying to find something positive to live for,

a depressing thought but what do we live for? do we livefor tradegy and disapointment? cause that sums of the lives of 80% of the people on earth, dismay and tradegy is all that befalls them, so what is the point in all this? are we puppets in someones sick game? is this a social experiment to find out humans real potential or  have we missed the test and we are just what has become of the remains afterwards?

the world is a funny place and ill wait for the day someone figures out why we are here, untill then all we can do is wait in hope, for hope is what carries us forward, the hope for a brighter future, whether that comes in money family or power who knows?

thats all for today i guess ………………..AnonymousMan Out!

confessionsofagamergirl:

Ultimate MineCraft fail.

thingsthatexciteme:

India Reynolds

artsygamer:

Resident Evil 5 - Sheva Alomar

so i was with my step-dad the other day in tesco,
and he said to me, “heard your older brother saw his real dad when he went to visit family, what do you think about it??”,

now at this point i had two choices to make,
Tell him the truth and say,
“well i havent seen my real dad since i was 5 so i wouldnt mind seeing him just to see what he’s like,”

or tell him lies,
“yeah he told me but i wasnt really paying attention cause i really dont care to be honest,”

what could someone do in that situation?
tell the man who has been there for me my whole life and guided me through my childhood the truth and make him feel like he doesnt matter anymore cause my real dads back on the scene,

or lie to the guy and say it doesnt matter to me and spare his feelings?

i personally went with the latter and lied,
primarily to spare his feelings but also selfishly to save my own skin,

now to be completely truthful i have no idea whether i want to see my real dad or not, part of me wants to me him just so i can bash his brains in with a blunt object for leaving my mum and burning her emotions in a hot pool of acid but part of me just wants to find the truth of my childhood cause there is not much i remember,

right now it is a blur of lies and deciet with no vision of clearness.

apart from this incident it has been a ok week as a whole this is not considering the huge argument i had with my fiance over the weekend and believe it or not once again it comes down to trust, she doesnt trust me and wants to keep tabs by looking through my phone and computer and i dont trust her alone with either of those things so i keep them locked or hidden, further fueling her paranoia, but what am i to do?
let her get her own paranoid way? i dont think so,
im gonna let her be paranoid all she wants cause at the end of the day although the thought has crossed my mind i have never cheated on her and dont intend to i would rather finish with her then cheat on her because really? why cheat on someone, it just means you dont want to be with them and every day i am finding more reasons why i dont want to be with her.

Anonymous man …………….Out!

Sick as Sin by Stagga featuring Skamma,

This tune is great especially for skanking to!
Rate this tune!

my earliest memory would have to be just before christmas when i was about 5 years old, my dad was  on his way to out to work and as he got in his van and drove off i threw a snowball that went through the window and hit him in the face, i remember the look of shock on his face

02:00 September 24th

This is my first time using any sort of blogging website and it has to be said i never imagined myself doing this,

but here i am posting all my thoughts and feelings because frankly sometimes i dont know when to show them,
im not here for attention or to put others down as i respect everyones opinion and respect other peoples feelings.

Firstly i would like to explain my reasons for making myself known as the Anonymous Man, this is because the kinds of things i wantto post on here i would not share with anyone i know in RL, i wouldnt dare to, but i have found myself needing an outlet for these emotions and to channel my thoughts somewhere where they can be lost to me.

My life up to this point can only be described as eventful, but dont mistake eventful for being all good, because like everyone, i have had my share of bad times, for me bad times occupy a large portion of my life.
Most of it family related but as they say you cant choose your family!

Like many others i have my hard times in my love life,  i am the sort of person people see as a clown, i laugh i joke but when it comes down to all seriousness nobody can take me seriously, people usually assume im joking whatever words come out my mouth, 99% of the time they are right, but sometimes its that 1% that really matters, i know what your thinking, “But if its only 1% of the time how could people possibly tell?”, well thats where my problem lies, nobody can.

I have have thus come to a point in my life where i sit back and think,
hold on…..
i am exactly what i have hated my whole life!

by this i mean the sort of man that treats women like bits of meat, i hate them sorts of men they grind my gears and what i used to believe was that they made guys like me look bad, but, like i said i have become what i hate and hate what i have become. i currently have a girlfriend but have many doubts about our relationship, and doubt is when im at my most selfish state, i have been chatting to other girls and flirting about and talking to them in a way some people would find a dumpable offense.
by this i dont mean cheating on my girlfriend, i mean just flirting in a way which would make a girl think you would want it to lead to that,

as you can see i have a lot of emotional problems and as well as using this as an outlet for my emotions any advice that people could give me that would be helpful to me would be very much appreciated, also feel free to ask me any questions however personal but for now,

AnonymousMan……………..Out